This post is a bit heavier than what I’d usually write, because things have been weighing on my mind lately.
Have you ever thought back to your younger days and cringed at the things you did or said?
I’m not sure what prompted it, but I was thinking about highschool lately and some of the things my friends and I used to joke about. Me, having almost no filter, contributed some pretty racey comments that I know I should not have been making. In the moment it seemed harmless, though I didn’t always take into account who may be listening. At least once, that lead to confrontation.
Looking back, that was a fair consequence. I upset somebody, they got angry and confronted me. My friends tried to help diffuse the situation by explaining that we were joking amongst ourselves and meant nothing by it. I ended up in another confrontation with the same person later over something different, but I still wonder if they weren’t already in edge from previous incidents.
My takeaway from this was that I should be trying to be more careful about what I say, and to who. Not only because of confrontation, but because you may look back—from a different frame of mind—and wish you could stop yourself. Likewise, you may have moments where you wish you had spoken up, perhaps to apologize or to come to someone’s defence.
The advice my father gave me, was “think before you do things”. If you carefully consider what you say and why you stand behind it, you’ll be less likely to blurt things out and regret it later. If it’s a joke, commit to the joke. If it’s a comment, commit to the comment. Also, commit to the consequences. If you can’t commit, don’t go through with it.